Take Control of your Life – Eight Powerful Tips
When you decide to take control of your life, incredible change happens. So, instead of merely existing and constantly feeling as if your life is out of control, you need to bring about change NOW. Is your time filled with things that you have to do, while you spend your life dreaming about the things you would love to do? Do social and financial obligations dictate most of your behaviour, while your choices are constrained by fear? This can cause a lot of stress in your life and the physical effects can be catastrophic.
Do you struggle to take control of your life?
Are you one of those people who feel that life has become a series of events that happen to you? Is your life out of control? It doesn’t have to be that way. And you can conquer your anxieties and eliminate the external obstacles that are holding you back.
Life can be unpredictable and challenging but it can also be full of fun, happiness, excitement and love. Love and fear are opposite emotions, and they are the two main driving forces that determine the way in which you play the cards that life has dealt you. So if you find that you’re living a life filled with disappointment, sorrow, pain and fear, it’s time to take control of your life and let the love in.
Love allows you to celebrate the passion, the joy and the exhilaration that you deserve. But fear makes you withdraw from the company of others and bury your head in the sand.
Release Fear to Take Control of Your Life
Fear can paralyse you and prevent you from taking whatever action is necessary, depending on the circumstances. Naturally you could be fearful of what you might lose. But ironically you might be fearful of what you might gain. The fear of not having sufficient money to settle your debts is quite natural, and so is the fear of being rejected, not being loved, or of not belonging to a particular group of people. And there is that common fear – the fear of being alone or lonely.
It may seem strange at first, but there is a time and a place for fear. Sometimes, if kept under control, fear can be a positive emotion in that it can save your life. For example, if you had no fear when climbing a steep and slippery mountain you might become over-confident and reckless, which could cause you to slip and fall to your death. So there is a time and a place for fear – provided it is reasonable and controlled fear. This sort of fear is positive and allows you to guard against danger and possible death.
Take Calculated Risks
Most people would agree that this type of scenario is quite reasonable. However, the problem is that too many people don’t know when to take calculated risks and how to live their lives to the fullest. They become stagnant and immobile, and allow their unreasonable fear to dictate their everyday thoughts and actions. They become suspicious of anything and everything that is new or different, which they perceive to be physically or spiritually dangerous or possibly life-threatening. Are you one of these people?
This type of fear is not only unreasonable but also physically limits the way in which you live your life, so much so that you begin to suffer from a kind of mental paralysis. This causes you never to be adventurous, never to take calculated chances, and always to lead a safely dull and boring existence.
Now here’s a suggestion. Why don’t you for once throw unreasonable caution to the wind and take control of your life. Take it by the scruff of its neck and start living to your full potential. If you decide to take the plunge, then here are eight simple steps that will lead you on the path to a life worth living:
Step 1: Set Clear and Attainable Goals
Determine the kind of reasonable and attainable lifestyle you want to live. This is your vision, what you see yourself doing in the foreseeable future. It must be something definite to work towards, otherwise the chances are that you won’t know whether you have attained it yet.
Also set the goals that you will attain. Note the use of the positive word ‘will’ in this sentence. These goals must be clear and concise, so that you know the sort of thing you can expect. Having determined this, change your attention to the tasks and activities that will assist you in attaining your goal.
Step 2: Get Ready for the Task Ahead and Take Control
Cast your mind back through the years and count, if you can, the number of good opportunities you declined because you convinced yourself that you weren’t capable of handling them.
Probably there were several. Don’t let this sort of situation happen again. Put it behind you. Start now preparing yourself by thinking carefully about the goals you’ve set yourself, and by considering what relevant knowledge and skillset you need in order to attain them. If you lack any of these skills or knowledge then don’t delay in acquiring them.
Step 3: Do Something that Scares You
‘You are free to dream as big as you want, but always remember that every big dream comes with some big responsibilities. So be willing and courageous enough to step out of your comfort zone.’ ~ Edmond Mbiaka
Fear can hold you back from doing what you want to do. Facing your fears will help you to break free of the constraints that fear creates. I have heard of a 100-year-old that did a tandem parachute jump to celebrate her birthday, but it could be something as simple as eating a meal in a restaurant by yourself.
Step 4: Start Networking
It’s quite likely that you lack the necessary knowledge and skills to reach your goal. But don’t worry. It’s not all that difficult to find people who have these skills and this knowledge. It’s necessary to start acquiring the help of a good social or professional network to help you eventually live the life you plan. It isn’t necessary to become close buddies with the people you need to associate with professionally.
And you don’t have to deal with anyone you don’t like. Usually your dealings with business associates are online. If you need to meet anyone in person then keep these meetings brief – unless of course you enjoy his or her company! What is important is that you cultivate those relationships that you can benefit from on a personal and professional level.
Step 5: Think of Everything as a Choice
Stop saying you can’t do things unless they’re physically impossible. Instead, say that you won’t, or that you have other priorities, or you’re not willing to make the effort.
Reflexively saying ‘Can’t’ all the time trains us to immediately dismiss every possible course of action that isn’t obvious and easy. By removing that word from your dictionary, you’ll train yourself to genuinely think about whether something can be done, rather than immediately discarding it as impossible.
As a matter of fact, I believe that people are often pessimistic because they're afraid. The've been disappointed so many times that they've decided to take on a negative attitude to protect themselves. It just becomes easier to assume that everything's going to go wrong.
If this sounds like something that you would do, then I suggest that you consider reading some self-help books. I have personally found that this is a good way to start on the journey towards a more positive future.
Step 6: Ask Questions to Take Control
Never waste any chance of dealing with anyone whose acquaintance could potentially be of benefit to you. Keep your eyes and ears open for these opportunities – they don’t come every day. Always be alert to any opportunity to ask questions, and use your imagination and inventiveness when talking to people.
Try to see situations from different angles and perspectives. By doing this not only will you learn a lot but also opportunities will start opening up for you. Nevertheless, don’t forget to give as well as receive. Life isn’t only about taking, so you should ‘pay it forward’ and help others when the opportunity arises.
Step 7: Take Calculated Risks for More Control
Avoid taking risks unless they are calculated risks. A calculated risk implies that you know precisely what can go wrong. This means that you have considered all the personal, mental, emotional, physical and financial implications. In other words, you have weighed all the possible pros and cons and the consequences of each risk. By controlling the decision-making process you can accept the consequences of your successes and failures.
Step 8: Declutter Your Home and Your Brain
Keep your home and workspace clean and organised. Remove any physical clutter, and tackle your mental clutter. To tackle your mental clutter you should get outdoors as much as you can as outdoor activities have been proven to reduce stress and improve mood. This will help you to focus on what you’re trying to accomplish, rather than your messy environment.
These eight steps apply to your personal life as well as to your business life. When you take control of your life, you immediately feel the freedom of leading a life of purpose and fulfillment. For more ideas on this subject have a look at lifehack.org.